The other day, I stumbled onto this video:
And, as a person who is trying to learn guitar, write songs, and sing, I couldn’t click on it fast enough.
His overall message was that all musicians suck to some degree. Most only ever show you the finished product because, it would be boring to go to a concert and watch a band try to create something on the spot with all the mistakes, backtracking, and fumbling around.
And that can lead people to leaving a concert and saying things like, “Wow! They’re so talented! I wish I was that good.”
It is true that some people pick up instruments or singing or painting or drawing or any artistic skill with ease. But most have to work at it a lot to be good.
This message of it’s okay to be bad at things and do them anyway gets lost in modern day because of social media and the pressures of competition.
It’s easy to go and find someone who is better than you at everything. So why bother trying? They’re already doing it well enough. The world doesn’t need your voice.
Or does it?
I think the world does need all of our creations. And not just the “good ones.”
It’s okay to share something that’s not perfect.
This is a lesson I’m desperately trying to learn and get over myself.
I have always loved music. As a kid, I loved to sing and dance and write lyrics to songs. I dreamed of the day I’d be able to learn to play guitar.
And somewhere along the way, I got lost.
People told me I wasn’t good at singing or that I didn’t have any rhythm. People told me my lyrics were garbage and that they knew better because they were first chair.
So I gave up.
I stopped writing for years.
I abandoned guitar for a decade.
I’d only sing when I knew for sure I was completely alone and no one could hear me.
And honestly, that’s so incredibly sad.
I lost something I loved because other people brought me down. I wasn’t immediately good so I thought I’d never be good.
But can you imagine where I’d be if I had continued? With 10 years more of experience? I’d be so much farther than I am today.
And that thought also makes me sad.
But it doesn’t mean it’s too late to try. I can learn more about music theory and what actually makes up a song.
I can practice and get better at playing guitar.
I can sing more and look up exercises and ways to sing better even if lessons are out of reach.
I can keep writing and playing around until I make something I’m proud of. Whether the world thinks it’s good or not.
And one day, I’ll be able to play and sing a song I’ve written in front of someone.
Being bad at something is a part of life. But we can take baby steps to get there.
Even if it means in the meantime I start by only post the lyrics I’ve written and not full performances.
Or if it means I only play in the confines of my own home for my dog and my husband.
There are no rules. We can be bad and do it anyway.
Embrace the suck.
Thank you so much for reading In the Clouds! This is a personal outlet I created to nurture my own creativity and to connect with other artsy people out in the world.
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"They’re already doing it well enough. The world doesn’t need your voice." - I struggle with this a lot, workwise. I always think there's an expert that knows more or someone with more lived experience than me so why should I talk about Thing X. I found myself shying away from speaking up about things or just turning into a curation machine - collecting the thoughts and findings of others without ever mentioning why I found it interesting in the first place. I did a cohort called Present Yourself with Women Talk Design and it was all about public speaking, preparing, crafting your talk, etc. But the thing that stuck out the most was the overall message of "your voice matters". I'm trying to let go of thinking I have to be the 'best' or most informed/most respected at something in order to talk about it. No one else can be me exactly so by default, I'm already the best me there is! That's gotta count for something haha
"I lost something I loved because other people brought me down." - Oof.... This part! That's what I love about kids before society knocks the weird and curious out of them. They try shit just because. No filter. No expectations. No worrying about others. I hope you get back into writing and playing music in a way that brings you joy, no pressure :)